There were a lot more to endure today. I hesitate to describe what I’m experiencing fully for fear of worrying those who cares about me. But I am determined to be completely honest in making these records. So before I continue, I want to assure everyone who loves me to not worry. What you are about to read may sound worse than what I actually experienced. None of what was going on with my body has affected my regular schedules. Please be confident that I am still well.
Since yesterday, I have been feeling a bit cold even though the temperature is high. I thought it might not be directly related to hunger. Yet today the feeling persisted. My body is getting weak. At times, I feel a very slight tremor in both arms and legs. And then there was the stomach cramps. They happened a few times right before meals, but never long. I feel best after eating, like now. Having had dinner, nothing can be more in the norm. Only two days to go. I can do this.
Feelings aside, filling my belling is getting more difficult. I struggle with whether to maintain a balanced diet, or to simply try to fill my stomach as much as possible when making meal plans. The hungrier I get, the more my priorities shift towards getting as much food as possible instead of eating healthily. I cut down on milk and meat today. A couple of days ago, this decision would be unthinkable.
For lunch, I still had an apple. It almost seems like a bad choice. Fruits are most unfulfilling. And without it I could get three times more pastina. Now that sounds very appealing. The sandwich I would normally find enough seemed much too small.
Dinner was equally unsatisfying, even though I got slightly more starchy food by cutting down on everything else. I am keeping this short. It seemed so pitiful, I can hardly think of something to say about it here.
This is the end of the third day; already the lack of food is having an effect on me. To think that soon this will be all over is a comforting one. But this is just me. There are 1.2 billion people out there who never know when their suffering will end. Hunger fogs the mind and weakens bodies. It exposes people to sickness. And these people, they are helpless against it. We, able bodied and healthy, can only try to do as much as possible to help. But will it ever be enough?
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